Say this, not that.

Here are some tips on how to sound smarter than you are during your day off.

brain500x

Say: I took a shower and shaved
Not: I took a shower at 13:30, and shaved “down there”.

Say: I drove the kids to school.
Not: I drove the kids to school in my underwear.

Say: I had a nice cheese panini sandwich for breakfast.
Not: I had a grilled cheese.

Say: I also had an espresso.
Not: I also had the 3 day old coffee – cold (because we don’t have a microwave).

Say: and some cranberry juice.
Not: and Vodka with some cranberry juice in it for the color.

Say: I then cleaned the whole house
Not: I then pushed stuff off the couch so I could have my grilled cheese.

Say: I spent the whole day reading & listening to music
Not: I spent the whole day reading blogs, chatting with Sheila while listening to BobFM.

Say: I had some chicken with some greens for lunch.
Not: I ordered chicken wings for lunch. It came with celery that I threw away.

Say: I reflected on life’s issues, and possibly found the solution to a few of the troubles I’m having.
Not: I took the longest crap ever, but forgot to bring a book.

Say: I found a way to be 10% more productive even on my days off.
Not: I discovered the wireless works well in the bathroom.

Say: I watched a classic television program.
Not: The A-Team was on at some point.

Say: All and all, it was a wonderful relaxing day.
Not: Meh.

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8 comments

  1. @SheilaCSR: Yup, I did. 😉

    @Avitable: I be!

    @NWCWD: I’m meh-gnificiant.

    @Sybil Law: I live to serve. 😉

    @CMG: Hence the book. You also start by losing the low points, so it’s the survival of the fittest IQ points. I’m only left with the high ones now.

  2. Just last night, my middle boy was asking me about the A-Team (and the theme). I filled him in with what I knew.

    As for me, I’ve been watching Rat Patrol on a regular basis. (Victor was such a young-looking German officer.)

    delmer recently said Getting it All Back

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