Sofa: King tired.

He said: “It pisses me off when you tell me that you will be back around a certain time and you get here three hours later.

She heard: “I don’t want you to go out with your friends.

He said: “You could’ve called to let me know you were coming back later.

She heard: “You need to tell me exactly what you did with those people because I don’t trust you.

Of course it went downhill from there.

She has every right to be mad that someone would prevent her from going out with her friends, and ask for a play-by-play of her activities.

But he’s not that someone. He says what he means, and he means what he says. He has a perfect track record at that.

So he’s still pissed.

And she still thinks he doesn’t want her to go out with her friends.



  1. Add the element of guilt in there for the person who’s pissed off when the reason the other person is 3 hours later than they should have been because of work.

    But it still pisses me off. And he still should have called.

    I don’t ever ask what he’s doing, I just wanna know he’s not dead in a ditch.

  2. PS – ditto what Poppy said. When the man was a repo man, I was always worried. But I couldn’t call him and have his cell phone go off while he’s sneaking up a driveway so I sat in worry while he was out having breakfast after a hard nights work. bla bla bla.

  3. I think I am shielded from some of this because of how much my wife understands how OCD I am. She makes an extra effort to be explicit and understands that I do the same. #notreallyocd #atleastnotdiagnosed #waitthisisnttwitter?

  4. @Finn: Me too.

    @Amanda: It sure does.

    @CMG: Oh it will.

    @Sybil Law: You betcha.

    @Poppy: Yup.

    @Usedtobeme: Thanks!

    @Sheila: Ahem… okay?

    @Avitable: Who knows! But odds are he meant cucumber.

    @Ren: RT: @Ren I think I am shielded from some of this because of how much my wife understands how OCD I am. She makes an extra effort to be explicit and understands that I do the same. #notreallyocd #atleastnotdiagnosed #waitthisisnttwitter?

  5. Suprised Becky (aka Hellohahanarf) hasn’t commented here. The title of this post is one of her favorite twitter phrases.

    I like Janelle’s decoder ring idea, cause they are needed for most male/female relationships.

  6. Last night while I was doing the dishes and waiting for Dawg to make the last 20 minutes to get home (he tries to always call when he’s on the way, and he had called) it suddenly dawned on me that you could have meant your teenage daughter in this post (and you’d be a seriously progressive parent for not adding in “dude, you’re GROUNDED”), but I just read what you said to Ren, and know you meant your wife.

    I always call Dawg when I say I will because he gets worried that I’m dead if I don’t. I don’t care if at the root it’s considered a control issue, it’s respectful to his wishes and is not detrimental to me as a person, so I do it.

    (And I say I always call him, but if I’m pissed off at him I don’t. 🙂 That’s happened twice.)

  7. @Janelle: I was just thinking that!

    @MartyMankins: Somehow I’m not sure male/male female/female relationshipsare better.

    @Poppy: I hear ya.

  8. She says: Did the work you did yesterday fix the problem?

    He says: No, haven’t had time to finish

    She says: Well, it seems much better.

    He says: It is not possible, haven’t finished!

    She says: Couldn’t someone have understood your answer (“No, haven’t had time to finish”) as you finished but it didn’t fix the problem?

    Still going downhill from there.

  9. I agree with Janelle – Mind reading classes should be mandatory for marriage. Because with those vows we magically should be able to know what the other is thinking, right?

    Calling when you say you’re going to, or when you’re going to be late is just a matter of common courtesy, not control. Otherwise people worry, and start planning the funeral (or so my mother told me the night I was 21 and came home at 4:30 in the morning when I had originally said “I won’t be out too late”…)

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