SheilaCSR

The death of a Joke

So yesterday I published what I thought was a rather simple yet charming post, asking you my dear readers to “follow the yellow brick road”.

Apparently, I didn’t make it obvious enough. It seems that not a lot of people understood that I wanted you to click on the picture. ūüėČ

That would’ve taken you to Sheila’s blog, where you would’ve seen a post for her Birthday.

A post that I made.

Of course, I had inserted a few hints that this post was not made by Sheila:

But it seems that I may not have been clear enough that it was actually Sheila’s Birthday. ūüėČ

But no worries: Because she is damn old In a weird turn of events, it turns out that even Sheila forgot it was her Birthday yesterday! So you get a do over! Go visit her blog and wish her Happy Birthday!

Kidless Week: Day Four.

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Getting Dizzy…

LovelyWife is still not completely 100% healthy so there’s a strict no kissing – or should I say no snooging – rule. It is completely true that you only notice things you had once they’re gone or unallowed. As for me, that¬†MacAllan, combined with Nurse Becky’s finger crossing¬†is doing the trick of keeping me on the 20% side of things.

All that being said, we still managed to go see Harry Potter (hence the “snooging” reference) eating literally¬†a tonne and a half of Swedish Berries, Peanut M&Ms, Red Licorice, and a giant Caramilk chocolate bar. We were not really hungry when we left the theater (go figure!) and we drove around until we finally settled on Les Foug√®res for dinner, but we didn’t dine-in. We only got some take-out items from their store.

LovelyWife got the Wild Mushroom Soup and Ginger Ice Cream, and I got the Bison Meatpie and Banana Cake covered with Cream Cheese frosting. We drove back home, heated the stuff and watched Big Brother.

All right, since I promised SheilaCSR to mention her in this blog today and to not spoil Harry Potter for her with a review, I will just say this about the movie: It was long, and I was distracted by the fact that whenever the cloth covering the armoire was removed, dust fell from it. All the snooging pissed me off a bit, but only because I can’t do the same. I ‚̧ Snape’s delivery.

Say this, not that.

Here are some tips on how to sound smarter than you are during your day off.

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Say: I took a shower and shaved
Not: I took a shower at 13:30, and shaved “down there”.

Say: I drove the kids to school.
Not: I drove the kids to school in my underwear.

Say: I had a nice cheese panini sandwich for breakfast.
Not: I had a grilled cheese.

Say: I also had an espresso.
Not: I also had the 3 day old coffee – cold (because we don’t have a¬†microwave).

Say: and some cranberry juice.
Not: and Vodka with some cranberry juice in it for the color.

Say: I then cleaned the whole house
Not: I then pushed stuff off the couch so I could have my grilled cheese.

Say: I spent the whole day reading & listening to music
Not: I spent the whole day reading blogs, chatting with Sheila while listening to BobFM.

Say: I had some chicken with some greens for lunch.
Not: I ordered chicken wings for lunch. It came with celery that I threw away.

Say: I reflected on life’s issues, and possibly found the solution to a¬†few of the troubles I’m having.
Not: I took the longest crap ever, but forgot to bring a book.

Say: I found a way to be 10% more productive even on my days off.
Not: I discovered the wireless works well in the bathroom.

Say: I watched a classic television program.
Not: The A-Team was on at some point.

Say: All and all, it was a wonderful relaxing day.
Not: Meh.

The reason I’m tired

You might have noticed a definite decline in words on this blog for the¬† past few days. The reason is pretty simple: We’re moving¬†our offices¬†to a new building, so I’ve been¬†putting stuff in boxes, dismantling computers and all kinds of boring wonderful things like that. ¬†

Since I’m an old man, I’m falling asleep almost as soon as my butt hits my not-so-comfy chair. Tahnkfully, someone’s chatting me up on GTalk on the bus ride home, otherwise I might fall alseep on the bus.

Anyhoo, here’s a few pictures of my now almost empty current workspace.

In other news

My BloggeyWifeMarriedToAnotherMike hes seen her shadow, so that signifies that her hiatus is over. Rejoice!

The Dedication Post

Hello! I’m sure you all already know who I am [geez – conceited much?] but just in case you are living under a rock somewhere, my name is Sheila.¬† I inhabit the insanely awesome domain,¬† Charm School Reject.

LeSombre is over in Africa doing all kinds of cool things, leaving his blog unattended.

Silly man was dumb smart enough to ask me to do a guest post for him. I feel bad for him – I don’t think he realized just what he was getting himself into when I registered with my very own username and password!

So, without further ado, let’s get on with the show!

LeSombre was supposed to write a dedication post for me.¬† I mean, we all know that this post was totally about me but he was trying to be all discreet and schtuff – don’t wanna hurt anyone’s feelings ya know!

Well, I really think that as his ForeignWifeToAnotherMan, I deserve some kind of perks.

It seems to me that a not-quite-so-obscure dedication post is the least he can do.

But….

He was a little busy spending time with his LovelyWife and Zadorable Children, in addition to the millions of other things he had to do to prepare for his trip.  I think that we can all agree that it would take a lot of time and many, many blog posts to encompass all of my awesomeness and something has got to give.  He promised me that he would get around to it once he returned from Africa and settled back into married life.

But….

I am impatient.

I also have a whole helluvalot of time on my hands.

So I decided to save him the trouble and write my own dedication post.

Besides, this gives me the opportunity to talk about my favorite subject – ME and, of course, my awesomeness. I swear, I am not conceited – I just know that I am better than you ::grin::

Now, seriously, let’s stop with all the bullshit and get this show on the road.

Since LeSombre loves math so much, I thought we’d do a little proof thingy like they have in geometry.

So – proof that LeSombre + Charm School Reject = Awesome

1.  Secret Language. LeSombre and Sheila have their own little secret language and it cracks both of them up to the nth degree.  Most people just think they are retarded.

2.  Code Names. LeSombre and Sheila have a special name for their insanely awesome duo.

3.¬† Call of Cthulu. Sheila actually gets LeSombre’s Cthulu references….she even thinks they are funny.

4.¬† Sword of Truth. Sheila didn’t tell LeSombre the ending of the series (even though it is practically driving her mad!) and even sent him a super special present to finish out the series for him. *

5.  Peanut Brittle. Sheila has a special place in her heart reserved for the buttery peanut-y goodness that is peanut brittle.  So does LeSombre.  *

6.  Canadia vs Chicago. LeSombre lives in Canada.  Sheila lives in Chicago.  Both are freezing cold three-quarters of the year.  Of course, Sheila dubbed herself an honorary Canadian but that was before she realized how much easier it would be if LeSombre just uprooted his family to Chicago.

7.  Jagermeister. Despite the chill inducing temperature of this drink, they share a love for the shuddery goodness of this black licorice flavored liquor.

8.  Meh. Collectively, their favorite word.

9.  Love at First Sight. They both believe in it.  They both have experienced it. Just not with each other.  Their friendship was one of those things that developed over a certain period of time.

10.  Technology Slash Computers. Sheila makes LeSombre feel full of super powers when he guides her through using the insanely simple insanely complicated programs that leave her dumbfounded, like GTalk, GReader and WordPress.  She also lets him show off his insanely awesome web design skillz by creating a one of a kind template for her blog.  [Geez Рthis Sheila girl is starting to sound like a saint!]

11.  The Inevitable Age Difference. LeSombre is old enough to be her father oldest brother but Sheila is nice and just refers to him as her ShugahDaddy (Donald Trump style) instead of CreepyOldMan (Hugh Hefner style).

So – there you have it folks – listed out in plain black and white – why Sheila is the Jager in LeSombre’s Red Bull; the splash of Captain in his Dr. Pepper; the Nicci to his Richard.¬† Oh yes folks, we are all these things and more.

He doesn’t make sense; I don’t make sense.¬† Together, we make sense. [Obscure movie reference here folks – did you catch it?]

I’m sorry that some of these are a little cryptic (see number one and number two) but I can’t go stealing all of his blog fodder so I am leaving these a little open ended.¬† I guess I really should be elected for Sainthood.¬† I am so giving and kind.

Blah blah blah blah.

xoxo

* Note from LeSombre Of course, the bitch forgot to include home made peanut brittle in with my Christmas present so maybe we should just stop writing this list. Come to think of it , the Christmas present she did send hasn’t even made it to the Great White Tundra of Canadia.¬† What a freakin’ bitch.¬† Please disregard this entire post.¬† I hate her.¬† kthnxbai.

Lame / Not Lame

africa

In 6 days, I leave for Africa

In 6 hours, I have to give a finished document that’s sucking the life out of me.

In 6 minutes, I have to post something on my blog.

So you’re getting this lame post.

In other news

Karl has special requested a guest post spot while I’ll be away. So Feb 1st is officially his to use and abuse.

That is the not lame part. ūüėČ

 

Apologies to Sheila, I promised you a dedicated post. Like you said, I just didn’t have enough time to put all you¬†awesomeness¬†on virtual¬†paper before the midnight deadline. I’ll make it up to you somehow.